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Welcome to Belovedgems, a blog about building a bridge between faith and mental health. The author rooted in her faith , her old-soul leads her into adventures to seek spreading hope into the world through a couple of written words.

How to have a Christ-centered friendship?

Relationships are complicated. That includes friendships.  I have noticed that like in relationships, friendships also have a honeymoon phase.  Everything is sweet and dandy for the first couple of months of the friendship.

All relationships are quite easy when everything is going quite well.  My personal theory is that you truly test the friendship or the relationship when conflict arises.  This is a great opportunity to learn how the other person resolves conflict and if you are willing to continue with the friendship.

But to prevent all this, I say it is better to choose wisely.  To have Christ-centered friendships that will lift you up instead of tear you down (1 Thessalonians 5:11).   Do not reveal your whole soul right away, but take the friendship slow.  Let the friendship flow naturally
(Proverbs 29:11).  Having a Christ-centered friendship is one of the greatest blessings God has given us.  Having someone who lifts us up through prayer, who is your comfort and, speaks truth to you is a keeper.

How to have a Christ-centered friendship?

Have you heard of the following verse: As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another (Proverbs 27:17).  Just like sharpening the blade of iron makes it more effective, friendships are to make the other one better.  How?  By offering support, constructive criticism, helping them grow within their potential, encouragement and accountability. Surround yourself with people who encourage you to continue your dreams.  Surround yourself with friends who instead of envy will be joyful through your success. 

Pray together and for each other.  Sometimes it is very vulnerable to ask others to pray for our needs.  But, this is why we need those friends who we feel comfortable and vulnerable. Those who pray together, stay together.  Having someone who you can text in the middle of the night to pray for you is comforting.  Having a Christ-centered friendship includes prayer.  

Read your Bible together.  I always find it so rich when friends and I read a book of the Bible together.  First, because it helps me with accountability and second because I love to hear what God is speaking to their hearts.  Growing together in Christ is a great experience and besides "Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken" (Ecclesiastes 4;12).  So, there is obviously power in number even when reading the word of God.  

If you have been hurt through friendships as I have, I pray for you tonight.  I pray God heals your heart and brings you that sister/brother in Christ who encourage you in our walk with Christ.  That one friend who will see all the potential God has placed in your life and encouraged you to move forward.  Paul speaks of mutual encouragement more than once in the word of God. Therefore, it must be important then.  "...that you and I may be mutually encouraged by each other's faith." Romans (1:12).

Let's remember that some friendships are only for seasons.  So don't be hurt long, it wasn't their fault if they left.  Friends are meant to be in our life for particular seasons of our life's and specific reasons.  Other friends are expected to be in our life's forever.

If you have found a friend, who has become like family you are truly blessed. God has placed a beautiful person in your life to share your joy and lift you up. “In friendship...we think, we have chosen our peers. In reality a few years' difference in the dates of our births, a few more miles between certain houses, the choice of one university instead of another...the accident of a topic being raised or not raised at a first meeting--any of these chances might have kept us apart. But, for a Christian, there are, strictly speaking, no chances. A secret master of ceremonies has been at work. Christ, who said to the disciples, "Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you," can truly say to every group of Christian friends, "Ye have not chosen one another, but I have chosen you for one another." The friendship is not a reward for our discriminating and good taste in finding one another out. It is the instrument by which God reveals to each of us the beauties of others.” ― C.S. Lewis.

To have a friend, we must first be a friend.
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